Thursday, July 19, 2012

How to Cope Up With Loveless Marriage

Love is a hard thing to maintain throughout life. While love marriages start with love it is not necessary that the couple stay in love forever. At some point in love marriages people start feeling suffocated, all the things which seemed thrilling earlier, now start seeming like unbearable.  Arranged marriages on the other hand may not start with love but once in love, it may help to keeps it going.

A lot of times people fall out of love or let a certain incident or disappointment break their relationship. If you were in love and now have fallen out of love or are good friends but do not feel an intense love for each other, make a few efforts to keep it amicable if not fiery.

Commit & create your rules

Every couple makes their own rules. There are things that create a barrier; there are things that hurt either partner. Being in a loveless marriage should at least settle on caring for either other’s opinion. For all you know along the way you give chance to your marriage. A loveless marriage can always be revived but it has to be both the partners working for it. Loveless can be amiable but not unbearable. An unbearable marriage will only meet divorce and hating.

Stay friends – Communicate

It is not necessary that you love each other with the same intensity as before. Though such would be perfect but if you feel it has dwindled down, make sure you maintain communication. A dead end is not worth it. Do not discuss topics that don’t really help, instead explore new things together or talk about things like you are friends, ask, tell. It shows that you care or at least are not interested in things just being the way they are. What do you know, at times your partner might just need a helping hand from your end?
Communication left too long can bridge gaps, talk things out.

Do not be rash

Though we have suggested you talk, make sure you don’t get to throwing words and statements around. If things haven’t been pleasant lately, do not push them. Know when to say what in case you lose your temper due to frustration and anger.

Its often we regret what we say in the heat of the moment later. Be wise and think before you speak. You may think the damage repairable but what if your partner takes it badly? Keep your cool while any heated discussions and put your point across diplomatically or better yet, wait for when things have cooled down.

Either move forward by forgiving and forgetting or stop short of destruction.

It’s often that a loveless marriage is because a couple marries for convenience or maybe they are amiable but do not share the intensity of desire or worse, because of an incident that was wrong on a partner’s part. Contemplate if you can live by forgiving if not forgetting or is it ok for you to let go of a relationship for that one incident? Totally your call, but while you may hold it as a grudge, you can still remain friends or maintain civilized mannerism.

A lot couples suffer loveless marriages yet it is not tough to live like companions rather than lovers. If you can do, why not give it a shot? Good Luck!


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